Short Cuts

A great song once said, "There's something happening here...." My new standard for op-ed pieces is two-fold: first, is it more in depth than the blather I'd get from my neighbor or some other idiot on the streets, and second, is it a piss poor attempt at humor by a writer who's not naturally funny. This piece on "budget-speak" by Wonk from the Free Press fails fucking miserably on both counts. The truly sad part? I paid money for this "analysis." Trite and lame are the best adjectives to describe. The Free Press continues its lovefest for Gov. Snyder--seems the poor little guv just can't get everything he wants because of that awful meanie "politics." Seems to me, though, that the very practices they are lamenting were indeed quite wise checks and balances put into Michigan's constitution, much like the checks and balances in the U.S. Constitution, to prevent the kind of unilateral, fuck over the rest of us (cuts to state employee benefits and wages, ending item pricing laws at the expense of jobs) changes Snyder wants. I particularly loved the title of this companion piece: "Snyder powerless against powerful agency." And thank God for that, since it seems the Michigan Civil Service Commission cares a lot more about folks like me and my family than Dudley Do-Right Snyder does. Seems Candace Miller, Michigan's Republican U.S. rep from the 10th District, was recently named the Great Lakes Legislator of the Year by the Great Lakes Maritime Task Force. This prestigious honor is roughly equivalent to winning the "I Didn't Eat My Boogers After Picking My Nose Award," presented annually by the National Hand Washing Foundation. How do you really fuck over the residents of Michigan? By moving ultraconservative Maura Corrigan from the Michigan Supreme Court (she never met a corporation she couldn't fellate) to the Director of the Michigan Department of Human Services (new motto: "We'll care for you like the Donner Party cared for its members!"). Seems Ms. Corrigan doesn't believe college students are entitled to food stamps and as an argument she uses the time-worn republican fear tactic--"People are cheating the system!" As proof, she offers...nothing. What's really sad is that while other nations are smartly building their nations' future by offering free college educations to their students (Germany, France, Ireland, India) we're sending ours into indentured servitude with humongous loan obligations, and trying to scare people over pennies. Penny wise and pound foolish is not likely to make for much of a future in America. The Detroit News continues its assault on the middle class by encouraging the republican (another group that hates the middle class) led legislature in Michigan to bypass the Michigan Civil Service Commission and screw over the working people of Michigan again by cutting wages and benefits, all the while creating lawsuit after lawsuit that we can ill afford. Brilliant analysis, guys! Nolan Finley continues his quest to turn Gov. Snyder into Michigan's own version of Ronald Reagan by rewriting history before it even fucking happens! No, Nolan, the lovefest for Snyder will be ending because Democrats and moderate independents are beginning to realize the emperor has no clothes, i.e., that Snyder, despite his claims to be oh so different from every other politician is, after all, just another republican. And to close it out, kudos to the Free Press for getting at least one thing right this week: this piece which tells us the stunning news that low taxes don't promise economic viability. It's the little things, I tell you.... Peace, emaycee